Summer's Desire

Haven't been this mad about drama since Autumn's Concerto (下一站，幸福)!!!

Summer's Desire/ 泡沫之夏 = totally awesome.
And this guy:

My new man.

Thoughts on the world cup

All Whites,

YOU'RE AWESOME.

Mid year already???

Soooo...

I realised I haven't said a single thing about uni.
I also realised this title thing is still sweet 16, making it ...expired 2 years ago.

OKay.
I looooove university T___T
I love lecture theatres. I love OGGB4. I love the pull out table things that don't exist in school. I love walking around everywhere. I love walking outside between classes instead of moving within a single building. I love how lectures are only 50 min long. I love the giant library. I love IC 3 and sometimes 2. I love all the free stuff in the first few weeks. I love stats lab. I love the clickers. I love the computers. I love labs. I love lab coats. I love the people. I love the demonstrators and tutors. I love the papers no matter how challenging. I love how a semester seems so short. I love how 8am classes prevents sleeping in. I love how assignments are all on computers. I love the underpasses. I love the red underpass more than the blue underpass. I love discovering shortcuts around campus. I love all the red buttons that open doors. I love too much><.

It's now the third week of exam period.
Feels like a holiday =_____= because of this whole week of nothing till the last exam.

It will be a first, to have an exam on a saturday... tho not as exciting as wen i first got the timetable. I could boast to a number of people, "HA! bet u never had an exam on a saturday before."
But na.
Rage!!!! of all saturdays, PLENTY of saturdays... it had to be this saturday.
There's a wedding at 1. Literally straight after.
At first, reaching there on time was the problem but now that I'm not needed...working out what to wear is the problem. Somehow, I must figure out a compromise between what is casual enough for exam and what is passable for a wedding...
This all sounds stupid when i could just carry along a change of clothes to magically transform into when I get to church.
Though I'm lazy.
Now it sounds like I don't care what I wear.
I always end up looking like a mess after an exam anyway...especially after ones in which I became brain dead.

cram cram

btw I love uni.

Disappointment.

It bites people.

This is my last distraction. Blog.

It honestly feels lik........
studying is becoming ridiculously IMPOSSIBLE EVERY EXAM PERIOD!!! WHY?!

Already went thru stinking 5 years of mid years, mocks, external exams and stil a useless student.

I love my subjects. No more English.
But why won't i study??!?!!
Why check for manga updates, find some anime/drama, restaurant citying when there is still 5 exams to go????

It's not that i don't wanna study. I CAN'T.

okay i can...but i won't. asdfkjlergteih

the power of distraction.... incredible

stupid.

i'm purposely seeking distractions!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My sister had her last exam YESTERDAY. My other sister had her last exam TODAY. Ti had her last exam TODAY and is flyin off tonite for HOLIDAY - i'll miss u T__T -. and.. nvm.

Wen December comes.... hehehe.
i can...no, i will...
sssleep in
stare at clouds
READ! DEFINITELY!
eat eat eat
play poke more bullyin time heeeee^^
just reeeeeeeelax n dun need to feel guilty bout wasting time on youtube manga fanfic FACEBOOK.

maybe i shud change direction again hmm... design didn't require studying... man i miss it.

stupid.

uni is in lik 3 months!!!!!!
not gonna be fickle.
too late. ok?!

Stupid pressure which is good for me

The previous blog was getting lengthy...

Starting a new fresh one.

I can't handle pressure!! I thought i could.
I should be able to but i can't.
I could for a while...

The coming cambridge exams are REAL important. to me. and only to me T___T All this stuff about rank score and gettin enuf points for this programme in uni BLEH.

So there are 11 papers over a month and THAT month is coming in a week. Therefore Term 4 doesn't really exist at Senior><

Tomorrow's the Feast of Tabernacle Combined Service...
I have NO CONFIDENCE in piano for worship. NONE. All the pro ppl in the eng congregation etc...

The whole week different ppl saying to me "why you?" "why not aunty elaine?" lol i agree. but c'mon hav a lil faith in me T___T my piano teacher is almost giving up on me T___T

I was also betrayed by my own blood!!!!!!!!! -sisters-

Choir performance tmr as well!! sigh.... last week i had a talk with someone... was it about how i should improve? or how i much i fail? lol it wasn't those kinda harsh critical confrontations so phew.

Actually...

Recently God has given me quite a number of criticisms through people...in school, at home, at church... I think ... I'm sure all were constructive and a few might have stung a lil... BUT they truly have helped! As much as i don't like these things... the GOOD consequences out of it are ... worth it? lol dunno the word.

Annnnywaaay.

Back to the whole im not worthy of piano.

I should only aim to please God^^ Gonna do my best ^^ (n hopefully improve to please everyone else as well)


--i need an idea for uncle's b day... GARGH.

Stupid piano

I'm always restrained by my parents to NEVER complain...
so ya i just won't say it out. in front of them.

The piano and I = a long story
This year is the 12th year of having lessons and it really could be the end ^^

Spent a year preparing for diploma and then...
because of ONE PIECE ...which is stinking 19 pages long i gave up. my teacher gave up. the piano gave up.
I dun hav any "feeling" for that piece and was going in the opposite direction of improving.

With the reason above and many others -lik im a failure-....

Forget diploma and go bak to certificate.

My "big" or main piece for the performance is waaay too pro for me and after all that time spent on it T___T
The teacher then replaced two other pieces for longer ones cos my programme was too short.

Who changes their pieces wen exam is less than a month away?!?!

My ENTIRE holidays were dedicated to practice. Three hours a day every morning giving everyone in the house headaches. I must admit i might have skipped a day or two tho...

Yesterday. Piano lesson. I disappointed my teacher. yeeeah... the whole time there was this freaky aura she was releasing next to me.><

Yup im exaggerating.. she was happy with ONE piece. the rest made her -____- (esther's commonly used face lol)

I can't be stuffed anymore.

Na actually I will work harder and get this over and done with.


sTUPID piano.
actually i love the piano.
It's STUPID FINGERS THAT CAN'T DO ANYTHING. or maybe it's the BRAIN. or my COORDINATION issues.

stupid me. ><